{"id":344899,"date":"2014-06-10T06:11:08","date_gmt":"2014-06-09T22:11:08","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.mariefranceasia.com\/uncategorized-hk\/comprendre-sortir-de-la-dependance-affective-344899.html"},"modified":"2014-06-10T06:11:08","modified_gmt":"2014-06-09T22:11:08","slug":"comprendre-sortir-de-la-dependance-affective","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.mariefranceasia.com\/hk\/lifelove-hk\/coaching-lifelove-hk\/comprendre-sortir-de-la-dependance-affective-344899.html","title":{"rendered":"Relationships: Understanding and preventing emotional co-dependency"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.mariefranceasia.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/7\/2014\/06\/shutterstock_160592534-750x4101.jpg\"><span style=\"display: block;\" class=\"wrap-img\" id=\"wrap-img-25643\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" itemprop=\"thumbnailUrl\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-25643 img-responsive  size-medium\" src=\"http:\/\/www.mariefranceasia.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/7\/2014\/06\/shutterstock_160592534-750x4101-625x341.jpg\" alt=\"shutterstock_160592534-750x410\" width=\"625\" height=\"341\" \/><\/span><\/a><\/p> <p><strong>How can you recognize emotional dependency in a relationship?<\/strong><br \/> In the <a href=\"http:\/\/www.mariefranceasia.com\/lifelove\/expert-advice\/free-yourself-from-the-opinions-of-others-11326.html\">sense of loss of freedom<\/a> and loss of self that is felt.\u00a0A mask for fear of losing the other one is worn.\u00a0We prevent ourselves from, for example, going out with friends or doing something we love, because we imagine that it will displease our companions.\u00a0And we suffer from it.\u00a0Dependence begins when we get so obsessed with the idea of preserving the link with our other half at all costs, to the point that we change ourselves to continue to please him.\u00a0 If the other person prevents us from finding ourselves and seeks to control our actions, we gradually leave our own desires for him and we distance ourselves\u00a0-\u00a0sometimes unconsciously\u00a0-\u00a0from who we really are.\u00a0However, we can love neither the one we own, nor the one who seeks to possess us.\u00a0Lasting love only works in freedom.\u00a0This is a <em>sine qua non<\/em> to love, but also friendship and, more generally, any harmonious relationship.<\/p> <p><strong>How to find this essential freedom?<\/strong><br \/> First, it is necessary to recognise that we are in a relationship of emotional dependency, and then to understand why.\u00a0The origins often begin in childhood and in the relationships maintained with parents.\u00a0There also usually is, in particular, the fear of abandonment.\u00a0We must then be brave enough to change that.\u00a0This means daring to expose yourself to the loss of the other.\u00a0To achieve this, there is not just\u00a0one way \u2013 for some, reading articles on self-confidence will be sufficient, for others, only psychotherapy will suffice.\u00a0In any case, it is important to be clear about your values, take the time to understand what is important to you, and thus determine what is negotiable or not.\u00a0Within the couple, say yes to concessions and no to compromise!\u00a0I would also recommend engaging in a fulfilling activity, which helps you to achieve and <a href=\"http:\/\/www.mariefranceasia.com\/lifelove\/coaching-lifelove\/9-ways-to-make-yourself-feel-loved-10505.html\">regain confidence<\/a>.<\/p> <p><strong>Is it always possible to get out of this addiction?<\/strong><br \/> No, even when love is present.\u00a0It may happen that one of the two does not support the changes induced.\u00a0This happens especially when the shift is sudden.\u00a0When one suffers in silence for too long, the changes will be brutal and the other may not understand.\u00a0The more slowly adjustments are made, the greater the chance of getting there.<\/p> <p>Catherine Dupont identifies the profiles of two lovers:<br \/> - The guilty personality.\u00a0She thinks she has received a lot, especially during childhood, and therefore finds it normal to give, and to chase after other people's desires.<br \/> - The abandoning personality.\u00a0She is much more likely to take.\u00a0She needs to be comforted and pampered.<\/p>  <p><em>Fabienne Boucaret<\/em><\/p>  <h5> <span><strong>Read more relationship advice on Marie France Asia:<\/strong><\/span> <\/h5> <p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.mariefranceasia.com\/lifelove\/coaching-lifelove\/9-keys-reeducate-man-17700.html#post-17700\">- 9 Keys to re-ignite the passion in your relationship<\/a><br \/> <a href=\"http:\/\/www.mariefranceasia.com\/lifelove\/coaching-lifelove\/aieshah-7-1-4-conseils-pour-stimuler-le-desir-25638.html#post-25638\">-\u00a04 Tips to stimulate desire in the bedroom<\/a><br \/> <a href=\"http:\/\/www.mariefranceasia.com\/lifelove\/coaching-lifelove\/sexe-7-jours-pour-le-faire-recraquer-25854.html#post-25854\">-\u00a0Sex: 7 Days to make him crack<\/a><\/p> ","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>How not to lose yourself whilst in a relationship? Psychotherapist Catherine Dupont gives us some insight and tips to avoid co-dependency.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":65,"featured_media":25645,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_yoast_wpseo_metadesc":"How can you be yourself whilst you're in a relationship? 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