The 'Fifth Trimester': 8 Tips to adjust to work after maternity leave

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Before You Return: Do a Dry Run
Pick a day towards the end of your maternity leave to give yourself a feel of your new schedule back at work. If you need to be in the office by 9AM, set the alarm to get you up then. Mentally run through your new routine and identify the kinks you need to work out. You might find that you actually need 20 minutes, instead of 10, to feed your baby in the morning. Or if you find you need to cut down time getting ready in the morning, prepare your outfits the night before. Having this 'trial run' can help alleviate the stress on that first day back at work - which is welcome for any new mom.
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Schedule Your Return Day for Mid-Week
If possible, schedule your return date for the middle of the week. Getting back into the swing of a full week at work right after your maternity leave can understandably be a shock to your system and your baby's.
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Before You Return: Look Good and Feel Good
Don't work up a sweat trying to fit into your pre-pregnancy clothes. Realistically, chances are they won't fit. After all, it took your body almost 10 months to get to where it is, so be patient as you make your way back to your pre-baby body. Invest in a fresh haircut and even a professional manicure and pedicure to keep you feeling and looking good for work. Also treat yourself to stylish postpartum clothes that will also be suited for work, if you find that most of your previous work wardrobe no longer fits.
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For Pumping: Stock Up
Here are a few essentials you need before you return back to work: a breast pump, a practical (and preferably professional-looking bag if you work in a corporate setting) to carry your pump, extra nursing pads (to keep at your desk in case something crops you and gets you delayed on pumping) and healthy snacks.
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For Pumping: Request a lactation room and a pumping schedule
Start pumping and freezing your milk a month before your maternity ends. This will get you in the habit of pumping and building up an emergency supply. Talk to your boss to come up with a pumping schedule that works for the both of you. For instance, you can suggest dividing your lunch hour into two pumping sessions. If your office does not have a designated lactation room, try using an empty office or conference room - preferably with WiFi or a phone - that you can use to pump and also continue productively working while at it.
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Put on a brace face even on the tough days
Although you be worrying about your baby, feeling physically and mentally exhausted, being daunted by the piles of work that have built up in your absence, never let your boss or colleagues think you're off your game. Keep your concerns to yourself, and avoid venting to your coworkers. Remember, your new juggling act might even make you more productive - something many new mothers can attest to. You'll find that you are willing to delegate, more able to think outside of the box, and better able to multitask.
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Be transparent with your boss
Before officially starting, schedule a quick meeting with your boss or superiors - outside the office preferably, to lighten the mood. There are a few grounds you may want to cover, like if there has been any changes you need to be aware of since you've been away, what his or her priorities are for you when you return, and how open they are to a flexible work arrangement for you, should you need it.
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Stay in Touch with your Mommy Friends
You've probably made a handful of new "mom friends" while on leave - don't neglect these friendships while you're back at work! Experts share that relationships with other moms are vital for emotional support - something that any working mom needs as she gets back to work. Aim for regular weekend get-togethers (with the kids!) whether it's at a coffee shop or a mom-and-baby yoga class. Throughout the week, stay in touch through a group chat.
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Hang In There
We get it - it's tough. In your first few months back on the job, you will definitely encounter days where you feel you can't manage and need to quit. However, stick with it. Brody, author of Fifth Trimester, advises to wait it out till at least six months before you make a decision. It's not uncommon to feel this way - experts say most mothers need time to get used to a new routine. If you're still unable to cope after a few months, consider asking your boss for a flexible schedule that lets you work from home one or two days a week. Be sure to come up with a concrete plan and also be prepared that your boss might reject it. If the latter is the case, it's also perhaps time to consider whether this job is right for you.

Just as you’re getting well-adjusted to spending all your time at home with your baby (with your work life feeling like a distant memory), you realise that your maternity leave is drawing to an end. The sheer thought of returning to work can be overwhelming: how do you juggle all the early mornings, long days at work and yet still return home to be ‘super mom’? And don’t even get us started on the ‘mommy guilt’.

The “Fifth Trimester”?

We define pregnancy in three trimesters, with the additional “fourth trimester” used to refer to the time spent post-delivery with your baby. However, not as much is acknowledged about the ‘fifth trimester’, a term coined and trademarked by author Lauren Smith Brody, former executive editor of Glamour magazine and mother of two, in her book, The Fifth Trimester.

The “fifth trimester” is the period where new mothers return back to work, typically before they feel emotionally and physically ready to. While many women expect and hope to be able to plunge right back into the swing of things at work, it’s not always the case. Dealing with the constant nagging mommy guilt, having to find time to pump while at the office, feeling like you can’t juggle it all – the struggle is most definitely real and also very universal.

In her book, Brody shares that the women she surveyed admitted to “not feel(ing) like themselves until they got to about the six month mark.” The book touches on everything from how to deal with mommy guilt, finding time to pump while at work and dealing with sleep deprivation.

The ‘fifth trimester’ is certainly is no walk in the park, but it’s most definitely not something you can’t rise above, as attested to by the seven hundred mothers Smith Brody interviewed in her book. Perhaps her best tip is this: “I think there’s something that goes on in our society that I’ve heard again and again in my interviews, which is that women just have out-sized expectations of themselves. The very women who climb the ladder at work, go home and want to be these exponentially amazing mothers.”

“And you think that’s what motherhood is… and it’s not. Motherhood is messy, and I really, really want women to know that they can broadcast the mess. They can talk about what’s hard. They can go back to work. They can still get their jobs done and do them well and then say, ‘Look what I did.”

For 9 helpful tips to ease your successful return and adjustment back at work, browse the gallery above!

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