Healthy Romance: The 14 best-kept secrets of happy couples

MF editorial team 05 Jun 2017

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14 Secrets of happy couples
Flick through the gallery to find out the secrets to a happy and healthy relationship!
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Establish foundations
For a romantic relationship to work, it is necessary to establish, from the very beginning of your partnership, a kind of "code” (or “guidelines”) to which you will live by while the two of you are together. In other words, take the time to have a serious discussion with your loved one to define the nature of your relationship, along with what each of you expect from each other. Breach questions like: What is your end-goal in this adventure together? Do you want to be exclusive, or do will you allow yourself to stray? What about the notion of fidelity?
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Ensure you love yourself, above anyone else
Before taking the step to deeply loving someone else, you must first learn to love yourself. If you are not in sync with your own self or you don’t accept yourself as you are, you will probably not allow your partner to give you the love you deserve and you will never truly flourish.
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Know when to have some time to yourself
Just because you are a couple does not mean you have to be constantly intimate with each other. On the contrary, in is important to have some space as well! Of course, a couple should share moments together, but that does not mean spending 24/7 in each others’ presence! For a more fulfilling and healthy relationship, both sides must be able to enjoy a great deal of autonomy whenever they wish. Moreover, without going so far as to lie or hide facts, it is important that each individual remain comfortable with each other not revealing every single small, tiny detail of their life — past or present!
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Be close friends
Couples who manage to stay loving and comfortable with each other are also best friends. No surprises there! The person you choose must, of course, also resonate with you on an emotional and sexual level, but this person must, first and foremost, be someone you can rely on at any time — a person whom you can trust with everything and with whom you can share everything. Like a close friend, this must be a person with whom you can have no filter and who will never judge you!
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Be sexually active
It is hard to keep the fire going if you and your partner no longer make love. The relationship becomes passionless and this could lead to dissatisfaction and indifference. Sex is an important part of the relationship, it should not be neglected. Making love is an intense moment of sharing that strengthens the bond you have with your most precious one.
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Engage in joint projects
We’re not talking about planning the date of your wedding or settling on the number of children you will have — you can start a little smaller! Having dreams and common ambitions are very important in a relationship. By considering ideals that have to do with the future of the relationship (e.g. buying/renting a house, opening a joint bank account, planning a holiday together) will give both parties a sense of moving forward with the relationship. This is especially true when the objectives set are the same.
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Accept your partner as they are
Are you a neat freak and is he rather messy? So what? With every relationship, tolerance is a must. When we love someone, we love them for their qualities and also their flaws. If you want your relationship to work, you will have to accept them as they are and learn to live with your partner's faults. And above all, do not try to change them — it will be a recipe for disaster.
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Know how to communicate
Communication is a couple's glue. Without it, the relationship is doomed to fail. If something bothers you, talk to your spouse directly (in a calm manner). By keeping it for yourself, you risk accumulating resentment and unleashing it at an inopportune moment. Don’t leave things to simmer! In a similar vein, if your spouse feels the need to talk to you, listen to what they have to say and do not interrupt them. Even if you are being blamed for something, it is better to clear the air first. By respecting each other in the communication game, you will have a higher chance of getting out of a delicate situation.
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Trust each other
It is difficult to build a relationship without trust. Yet, to grant it to your beloved is sometimes easier said than done. In particular, when it was previously taken advantage of and broken. Nevertheless, even if you’ve been betrayed in the past, you must give a chance to your current partner to be worthy of your trust as you can never build a meaningful relationship without it.
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Maintain the relationship
In love, as in friendship, relationships that are not maintained tend to fade. Just because you have been together for more than five years doesn’t mean you no longer have to be as attentive to your partner as you once were. By taking the relationship for granted, you slowly start to unbuild a hard-earned connection. A happy couple is a couple who doesn’t just let the years go by like clockwork!
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Compromise
To be in a relationship is to know how to make compromises and concessions. You want to spend Christmas with your beloved, but his parents want him to spend it with them on an overseas vacation? Rather than cause a scene about it, find some way to compromise! Come New Year's Eve, invite him over to spend time with your parents and celebrate together at your parents’ home.
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Accept each other’s differences
Disputes are inevitable. Nevertheless, rather than getting bogged down in a dispute, it is sometimes better to let go and accept that some conflicts cannot be fully resolved. It is only at this price that you will manage to be happy.
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Play the honesty card
You think he is too nice to his friends, but aren’t brave enough to tell him for fear of upsetting him? Lost your job last week, but are continuing to leave in the morning for fear of announcing it? Even if it is important to have your own personal thoughts and to make your own personal decisions, you must also be transparent with your partner. That is, if you care about your relationship. Lying or hiding things has never been beneficial for anyone.
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Do not let an imbalance of power take hold
This is one of the most (if not the most) important rules! There must never be inequality in the relationship. Both parties must have the same weight in common decisions (the children, the house, the finances) and neither should feel belittled.

It is definitely possible to remain a happy couple in a happy household for several years — and longer! The both of you just need to respect a few basic rules within the relationship. Here are 14 tips on how to cultivate happiness.

With so many distractions in this modern day in age — from an endless string of working commitments to technological devices that steal away our undivided attention — it can be increasingly difficult to find the time to socialise, let alone the time to just be in a loved one’s company. Thus, it is important to seek advice on how to remain in a happy and healthy romantic relationship with your partner.

From your communication style to the way you build a meaningful connection, the bond you share with your significant other is a constant work-in-progress that cannot be forsaken. So, if you are keen to know how to make your relationship thrive, head up to the gallery to discover the simple secrets of happy couples that you should keep in mind to make your loving relationship last.

Angela Goh & Laura Gabrieli

Photos: Getty Images

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