Growing up: What does it mean to be an adult?
mis à jour le 14 July 2015 à 18:31Frédéric Fanget, psychiatrist and psychotherapist, explains the key points for making the successful transition to adulthood. This article looks back at the moment we realise we've grown up
Is being an adult a condition, a status or a feeling?
Frédéric Fanget: It is a lifelong changing state. We can feel like an adult one day, and like a child the next; mature in certain circumstances, but infantile in others. We can embody the adult professionally and be immature effectively. It is, as if we walked by zig-zagging on a wide path. The most important thing is to move up in a conscious mode.
How does this transition arise?
We live it. We appropriate it by acts or outside events imposed on us, such as childbirth or the death of a relative. Being an adult means being able to adapt. For example, refusing to visit our mother at the retirement home is a sign of immaturity. Being an adult means not being afraid of old age and death.
Should we cut the symbolic umbilical cord with our parents in order to feel like an adult?
This idea is obsolete. If I visit my father tomorrow and feel like I’m becoming a child again, there is nothing wrong with that. On the other hand, it becomes problematic if I act in a childish manner with my son.
Marie Le Marois
Read more from our 'Being an adult' set:
Testimony: What does it mean to be an adult?
Testimony: When did we become adults?
